It Came From The Cellar: Five Fine Fantasy Alcohols

Gryphonson Brews is a brewery and mixer founded by Kvelis Gryphonson, a wild elf paladin of the trickster god, who settled down after receiving a signal to retire from her deity.   She has turned her adventuring fortune into a successful business in specialty liquors. Most Gryphonson Brews are made with mundane ingredients and can be found in taverns throughout the land, but the high-end Limited Collection, themed after challenges or locations the owner encountered as an adventurer, is made with exotic ingredients. One or two new brews are added to the Limited Collection every year, while old brews may retire from production.

  • Cryptgarten Premium, stored in a bottle decorated with zombie arms reaching for the crystalline stopper, is a murky brown drink fermented with edible cave mold in place of yeast. It has a pungent, metallic taste that develops into oaky notes with an autumnal finish. This is one of the cheaper items in the Limited Collection, and is marketed towards those who spend money to appear poor. A small quantity of a numbing substance derived from carrion crawlers is concealed in the stopper; consuming this numbs the entire digestive tract for a six-hour period.
  • Galvanic Sunrise is sold in a bottle decorated with a swirling desert landscape in brilliant yellows and blues, with a top resembling a dragon’s head. The effervescent, translucent gray brew is remarkable for two desert ingredients: blue dragon urine (alchemically processed for a long shelf life) and blisterpod cactus juice. The sourness from the first sip mellows into a heady, slightly astringent berry taste as more is consumed. Hallucinations from the cactus juice begin some time after the second shot for the average human.
  • Cold Cove Supreme has only one special ingredient (water from cthonic regions of its own Elemental Plane), but it’s rumored that additional magic is worked into each bottle. It looks like rum, stored in frosted blue glass bottles with pre-weathered labels. The smooth, molassesy taste rapidly gives way to a chilly, almost mentholated depth that cleanses the palette. To create a Smuggler’s Delight, caramel-infused khefir is mixed with Cold Cove Supreme and served in a salt-rimmed glass.
  • The Sigil Blend is a fortified wine of a deep burgundy color. The slim bottle is designed to resemble the Singular Spire at the center of the multiverse. Precisely what goes into the blend is a trade secret, but given the exorbitant price on each bottle, there are likely many ingredients. Consumed straight, the blend offers an overwhelming and occasionally clashing flavor profile, but it mixes very well, and is even better in cooking. The trickster god’s symbol adorns the top of each cork; in addition to symbolically placing the god’s symbol at the pinnacle of the multiverse, this is Gryphonson’s clue to the prospective drinker that the extravagant wine is not what it seems.
  • Seeker’s Gambit is by far the rarest and most overtly magical drink in the Limited Collection, and the process of its creation remains another of Gryphonson Brews’ secrets. It is stored in a plain glass bottle with a yellow label bearing the trickster god’s symbol and a warning in extremely fine print. Seeker’s Gambit is potently alcoholic, but also heavily flavored with lemon and a sweet grass native to areas that are warm year-round. The magic of Seeker’s Gambit triggers upon the emptying of the last drop from a given bottle or upon the conclusion of a drinking game played with it, whichever comes first (if a bottle is emptied during setup for a drinking game, the effect triggers upon conclusion of the game). At the time that the trigger is met, an illusion rises up out of the most appropriate nearby vessel and bestows a geas/quest upon the drinker who met the trigger (duration 1 year, no save unless the fine print was read and a loophole was somehow discovered). The illusion often takes the shape of a genie, but a myriad of other forms have also been observed. The quest is usually grand in scope but can be anything—the retrieval of a long-lost artifact, the slaying of a powerful entity (benign or malignant), the fulfillment of the drinker’s most sequestered ambition, etc. The rumors have it that those who fail in their quests disappear and are never heard from again.